I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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