there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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