I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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