I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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