with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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