I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
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He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
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I'm just crazy horny about you
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.