Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
