i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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