I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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