I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
