obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Randomize
