we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
birth control should be required to get into college
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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