Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
