I wish I could punch you in the face.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
He has the fingertips of a God
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
