i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Why did my mother make you get naked?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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