you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
