You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
