i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
