piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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