And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
