dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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