Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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