i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Boobs speak an international language.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
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