You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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