i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
