I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
