Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
