just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
