my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
this will be a night to untag.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
