38 yer olds are good kisserssss
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
