Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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