and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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