Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize