Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize