Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
