He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
