I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
