your room smells of hookers.
And success
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
