just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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