talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
