why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
