So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
