Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
