I'm drive I can fine osifer
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
