let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I cut my penus on the lid.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
