You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize