he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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