I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Alive.
So much puke
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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