She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
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