I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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