There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I got inside last night via doggy door
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
