The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
cat food counts as protein by the way
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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